Here it is, the infamously not famous Fix The Toaster holiday list of options besides driving drunk.
1. Pay money for a cab/Lyft ride.
2. Call your friend of parent for a ride.
3. Get a hotel room.
4. Lay down on the sidewalk outside of the bar.
*yes, you might go to jail but it will be safer
5. Admit you are too drunk to anyone and someone will get you home.