Today is the last day of Driving Distraction Awareness Month.
Tomorrow marks the anniversary of the death of my friend Polly Mae Tolonen.
DDAM barely made it on the radar of media. Pretty pathetic really considering car crashes are the number one cause of death to kids. Polly wasn't a kid when she died, she was 33, her 34th birthday was to be 13 days later.
Today I got my hair done. I have missed talking about hair since her passing. Because hair is trivial, silly and fun. Death is none of those things.
Months before he death we watched one of my husband's screeners. Polly and I watched "The Diving Bell and the Butterfly" about a man, who come to think of it now, became paralyzed in his body due to a car crash.
We shuttered as we watched it.
Just last night I watched "The Impossible" with Naomi Watts. It's a horrifying film.
The reason I bring up the films is they both stand for two different kinds of ways we die. One is a completely unavoidable tragedy and the other is caused by our carelessness. Death and tragedy are of course around every corner as are beauty and hope.
But I believe in my core that we need to do more to drive more safely. This is not something to just be accepted as we would a tsunami, unavoidable, uncontrollable. Because it is not.
And so I sport my somewhat dorky new Fix The Toaster t-shirt, got my hair done and had my son snap my photo, giggling because I think Polly would have enjoyed making fun of me for this venture.
But it has become a passion.
Polly was pursuing her passion, acting.
My Temple emailed me today and said that her name would be said at this Friday's Shabbat service. It's a Jewish custom called The Yahrzeit. Myself not being Jewish I've only learned of it since her death. So this will be the 4th year her sweet name echoes through Los Angeles and candle will be lit in her name. The candle can burn for up to 24 hours.
I just wish I was calling her or greeting her as she came over and could see my kids.
Anyways, drive safe everyone.
